A Lesson I Learned About Self-Worth From My Father

A Lesson I Learned About Self-Worth from My Father

Raising Kids/Growing Parents Community

Hello everyone,

I want to share my father’s self-esteem story. It is a powerful example of resilience and self-worth.

My father ran away from an abusive home when he was ten years old. He left Rome, Georgia, and made his way to Chicago, Illinois. He lived on the streets for months before being taken in by a family. That experience could have broken him, but instead, it molded him.

By the time I was born, he had served as a military policeman in World War II, returned home with a disabling back injury, and was raising me and four other children from my mother’s previous marriage.

With a sixth-grade education, “professional” jobs were unattainable. The typical manual-labor jobs available to “Negroes” of that day were difficult (if not impossible) to do because of his back injury. Somehow, he managed to find a way to provide for me, my four older siblings, and the four younger ones to come.

Why It Matters

I was an adult before I realized just how remarkable my father was. With all the challenges thrust upon him, I never heard him complain about his life. I came to realize that his peace came from his having a powerful sense of self and a high degree of self-esteem

He was never impressed by titles. He treated everyone the same—no matter their status—and often said about powerful people, “Their stuff stinks just like mine.”

My father’s positive feelings about his own life allowed me to develop a powerful sense of self, and healthy self-esteem. I grew up believing in possibilities, not limitations.

He taught me that your past doesn’t define you—your mindset does.

In my book Growing Into Your Parenting Role, I started the chapter on self-esteem with a quote from Homer Miller that highlights the powerful impact of mindset.

“Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens. Circumstances and situations do color life, but you have been given the mind to choose what the color shall be.”

One of the goals of our Raising Kids / Growing Parents Training is to give young adults tools they can use to paint the life they so desire.

What's Next

Next week I’ll share some simple, actionable practices to help you strengthen your confidence. If you have not done so yet, make sure you listen to our podcast for this month (The Key Role Self-Esteem Plays in Parenting - Season 01, Episode 02). The podcast picture below will take you there

Remember... the best thing you can do for your child is to become the strongest version of yourself.

We are pleased you have joined us for this month-long discussion of this important adulting/parenting issue.

Let’s Grow Together!

Bill Shackelford, Founder
AP Academy and
Raising Kids / Growing Parents Community